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Vodka,
Rootbeer,
and the Full Monty
Author: Leigh Rose
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Dalet quickly climbed onto a makeshift stage.
“Lights! Camera! Music!” he drunkenly stirred. He wobbled a bit. The music came on. Teasing, Dalet started to do the full Monty. Catcalls and hoots came from the other slayers. He stripped his shirt tantalizing off.
“Wahoo!” Dalet grinned as he slowly and dancing took off his belt, waving it in the air. Soon all he had left on was his leopard spotted underwear.
Miguel looked up from his third cup of vodka, drowsily. Grabbing a spatula he quickly ran up on stage and smack Dalet with it.
“I am Luke Skywalker. Fight me Vader” Chesta grabbed another spatula while on his fourth cup of root bear.
“Luke,” he said in a raspy voice, “I’ am your father”
“NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOO”
Dalet crawls away.
Dilandau- Sama stood up on the table, tittering dangerously. He looked at all his slayers through half drunk eyes.
“I am Sailor Moon, I will right wrong and fight all evil, and that means you. MOON TIARA MAGIC” He quickly took off his head thingy and through it like a boomerang.
Gatti and Guimel both screamed as they envisioned a large wolf creature came at them. As it leap for the girls. er. I mean guys Dalet swings down from the ceiling on a vine whisking the pair off.
Gatti looks at Dalet with adoring eyes.
“I’m saved. Saved by a wild man in leopard underwear.” Dalet sets them down.
“Me, George of the Jungle”
“Oh, George my hero” Guimel cooed as he snuggle closer.
“I am Sailor Mars, on behalf of mars, I will flame you. MARS FIRE SURROUND” Dilandau leaped off laughing insanely.
“Get off my jungle man, you slut” Gatti growled.
“Your man?” Guimel glared. Dalet backed off slowly and climbed on his vine.
“AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH”
“George. Watch out for that”
SLAM, CRASH
“Ohhhh” Dalet groaned.
“Wall” Gatti and Guimel finish lamely.
“No father don’t go” Miguel eyes filled with water as he held Chesta in his arms.
“Luke, May the force be with you.” Chesta eyes closed.
“NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO”
“ I am Sailor Venus, prepare to be destroyed evil doers” Dilandau slipped on a sailor skirt dancing.
“He’s mine” Gatti growled.
“No Mine” Guimel yanked on Gatti hair.
“Why you little twit” A full pledge catfight breaks out. Dalet looks around rubbing his hand on his head where a large bump was taking place. He looks around shock at what he seeing.
First of all he’s naked. Second, Gatti and Guimel are ripping each other hairs out, Miguel is crying with Chesta in his arms and Dilandau-Sama is wearing a short skirt screaming out “JUPITER THUNDER DRAGON”
“WHAT’S GOING ON HERE?” Dalet yelled out. Every eye landed on him.
“It’s that butt-ugly Zongi” Miguel shouted, waking up Chesta “Get him”
“AAAHHHH” Dalet ran around the room as all the slayers ran after him.
“MERCURY BUBBLE BLAST”
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Falcon walked quickly into a tavern where Dilandau and the dragon slayers were last seen. Falcon eyes budged.
“I don’t even want to know,” He muttered. All the slayers were grinning stupidly at him.
“Whatz up”
“Whatz upppp”
“Whatz upppppp” All the slayers burst into giggles. Falcon took one last look before heading out the door. The slayers woke up the next day with major hang over. They all ganged up on Dalet.
“Hehehehe. I swear I didn’t know it was vodka.” He inched nervously to the door.
“Get him” Miguel shouted.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHH”.